Reach For Me
by NT aka Aku-chan
Summary: Summary inside YukiKyou, AyameKyou ALL YAOI! chapter 3 up
1. Prologue: Blame Me For Your Lies

Title: Reach For Me  
  
Author: NT aka Aku-chan  
  
Pairing(s): Yuki/Kyou, ?/Kyou, and Hatori/Shigure randomly and maybe others like Haru/Momiji or something  
  
Summary: Yuki can't handle anymore of the insults and all the rejection since he first started dating Kyou, leaving the ginger neko colder and more closed to the world than he was before. Maybe another Sohma will be able to help him. And how will Yuki react to the new bond?  
  
Warning(s)/Heaven: Yaoi AND ONLY YAOI! NO HET OR YURI! Angst, dark themes  
  
Disclaimer: Trust me, if I owned Fruits Basket, it will be ALL YAOI! Makes you want to just give me it now, doesn't it?  
  
Aku: Don't mind my disclaimer... he's... umm... drunk [sweatdrops]  
  
Everyone: o.o  
  
Shigure: Hey! So am I! Oh 'Tori-chan!!!  
  
Hatori: -.-;;;;;;; leave me alone, you drunk baka.  
  
Aku: Errr... anyways! This is my first Fruits Basket fic, but definitely not my last! Sorry if the characters are OOC... I haven't watched the anime in a while and my memory is... not very good.  
  
Kyou: Horrible, bad, extremely poor, short, non-existent.  
  
Haru: Or all of the above.  
  
Ayame: I chose door number two!!  
  
Momiji: Ding ding! You win!! Yay!!  
  
Aku: x.x  
  
Yuki: Here's the fic already.  
  
%%%  
  
Prologue: Blame Me For Your Lies  
  
%%%  
  
"It was a mistake. I'm sorry. I... shouldn't have said yes..." His violet locks blanketed his eyes in a shadow, as the two slim figures stood outside of the school, the sun still high in the sky, though slowing dimming out by the oncoming clouds.  
  
The breeze, though slightly chilly giving sign to the autumn season, didn't faze the two in the least, as the tension around gave the air an almost suffocating feel. The tan hands clenched into fists tightly, giving the skin a pale glow as blood slowly formed from the restraint their owner was putting on it.  
  
It was a matter of pride.  
  
"No..." His voice didn't waver in the slightest, sounding hollow and miles away from the other. This wasn't how it was supposed to happen. "It's my mistake..."  
  
'Blame me... always the fool. The one to be tricked. It'll never end, will it?' His mind calmly asked bitterly, already realizing the answer.  
  
"My mistake for thinking that you actually meant the words you said..." The other winced, hearing clearly the edge of venom, as if the neko were trying to slice through him with a blade known as his words.  
  
"Kyo-"  
  
"Stop already!!" His voice yelled, on the edge of hysterics. "Stop..." Kyou kept his head lowered, not wanting the nezumi have the pleasure of seeing his tears. Small fragile drops fell to the ground, as the taller one watched, his ears expecting to hear a small sound when they hit the concrete sidewalk.  
  
Kyou clenched his scarlet eyes shut, feeling the tears slowly form a line down his cheeks and drip off his chin. Yuki felt the pain burn in his chest, his instinct telling him to just embrace the neko and pretend this never happened.  
  
'But... I have to.' The stubborn part of his mind kept him from comforting his koi. Repeating the same thing over in a sequence that would never cease to end.  
  
"Kyou, we can still... we can still be friends." His lips tried to form a semblance of a smile and his eyes tried to lighten into what he hoped would seem reassuring. But neither went his way, and his own heart wrenched as Kyou took a step back from him, as if wanting to walk away from Yuki's life completely.  
  
"Yuki... you're a liar..." And he couldn't take it. He couldn't handle the reality of it all. So he did what his instincts told him to. He ran.  
  
The clouds darkened as if in mockery of the fleeing neko, his heart pounding as the thunder overhead. He wasn't going to let it happen. He wasn't going to have himself fall. Not again. And he began the process of isolating himself from the world. He didn't need it. He didn't need Yuki.  
  
'Kuso nezumi... You're a liar!!!!' His thoughts screamed, fleeing with his legs as the rain poured heavily on his tan skin, his heart crumbling with the hurried flow of water against his body.  
  
The trees past by in a blur, none of him focusing on where he was going, just that he needed to leave. He couldn't return to Shigure's house, knowing that was where Yuki was heading, so he fled into the woods, the home to filth like himself.  
  
Not watching his footing, the rain allowed him to fall straight to the mud- stained ground, his hands and knees keeping his face from drowning himself in the heavy downpour. "I don't need him..." He whispered, convincing himself that he was not crying that it was merely the rain. "I don't need you, Yuki... I don't need you!!!!!"  
  
And he leaned against a tree, the cold bark painful on his sensitive skin. He closed his eyes, stopping the tears- no it was only the rain. His drenched hair, their ginger color dulled by the water, stuck to his skin, but he didn't bother to move it. He curled in on himself, hugging his legs, as his sobs were suppressed when he knew that this would probably be the only comfort he would be granted.  
  
"I'm the liar now... I need you, Yuki..." His voice, lost of all their hope and defiant nature, was left vulnerable and broken. "I'm a worthless baka neko..."  
  
%%%  
  
To Be Continued...  
  
%%%  
  
Aku: [sweatdrops] Okay, that was bad x.x  
  
Yuki: Why'd I do that?!?!  
  
Aku: To feed the angst?  
  
Angst: [burps] Full...  
  
Yuki: -.-;;;  
  
Momiji: Please review or I'll pout!  
  
Haru: That's a threat?  
  
Momiji: YUP! 


	2. Chapter One: Finding An Angel In The Dar...

Title: Reach For Me  
  
Author: NT aka Aku-chan  
  
Pairing(s): Yuki/Kyou, ?/Kyou  
  
Warning(s): Yaoi AND ONLY YAOI! NO HET OR YURI! Angst, dark themes  
  
Disclaimer: The answer is Brussel Sprouts.  
  
Aku: O.o  
  
Disclaimer: Brussel Sprouts = bad = no own  
  
Aku: x.x  
  
Kyou: Thanks for reviewing my pain!!!! [pouts]  
  
Yuki: Bah, I want my Kyou back!  
  
Aku: Tough luck, meaniehead!  
  
Yuki: -.-;;;;  
  
Momiji: STORY!!!  
  
%%%  
  
Chapter One: Finding An Angel In The Dark  
  
%%%  
  
Yuki stepped into the warm building, shivering slightly, yet relaxing, as he was no longer pounded down by the rain. He shook off his jacket, and slid his shoes off. Finding himself a towel from the bathroom to dry his hair off, he walked into the kitchen.  
  
"Hi Yuki-kun," an ever cheerful girl beamed, as she continued stirring the soup that was for dinner.  
  
"Hi Honda-san." Yuki greeted, trying to hide the worry in his eyes, as he looked around for the temperamental neko.  
  
Tohru turned around, noticing the slight unease look Yuki had, though trying to hide. "Is something the matter, Yuki-kun?"  
  
"Iie, it's nothing." Yuki smiled reassuringly and walked up the stairs to his room. Opening the frail Japanese sliding door, he sat by his window, watching as the rain fell harder than it had when he first came home.  
  
"Where are you, Kyou?" He asked no one, hoping that the neko would just appear and be safe and warm where he could hold- 'No, I can't do that anymore.' Yuki reminded himself, wincing at the torture he was creating for himself, the pressure on his heart building.  
  
Minutes slowly passed, an eternity it seemed for the nezumi, his eyes scanning the grounds outside for any sign of his neko. "Yuki-kun! Shigure- san! Dinner!!" Tohru called, her sweet voice drifting enough to reach their ears.  
  
Both men came down the stairs, as they sat at the table. Shigure looked questioningly around the room, noticing that one spot was empty. "Oi where's Kyou-kun?"  
  
Tohru eyes quickly glazed over with concern, her eyes darting around the room. "I don't know. Where could he be??" She looked to the window, dread building in her throat as lightening struck. "Wah! What if he's out there?!"  
  
And that began her mental images of a soaking, freezing little orange cat, trying to find his way home in the pouring rain and accidentally walking across a street with a car headlights coming closer and closer...  
  
"What if he's hurt?!?!?!" Tohru stood up, trying to stay calm, yet failing miserably.  
  
"Kyou-kun can handle himself. Don't worry, Tohru." Shigure smiled reassuringly, masking his own worry, as he changed the topic. "This soup is delicious!"  
  
Tohru calmed down slightly, trying to stay positive, as she beamed back at the inu. "Arigato."  
  
Yuki stayed silent, his mind pondering on the topic that was at hand moments ago. 'Kyou... please be okay... gomen nasai, Kyou...' Each beat of his heart sent a chill of pain through his veins, as the guilt and regret slowly built around him.  
  
'I did the right thing... didn't I?' And silence was his only answer, as the rain continued to pour down.  
  
###  
  
He opened his white umbrella, locking the door behind him, as he easily slipped the key into his pocket. Humming a cheerful tune, he smiled as he walked along the rain-drenched ground, not letting it spoil his mood. And then a small sound caught his attention.  
  
A small mewl.  
  
He looked down at his feet to see several little kittens purring at his feet.  
  
Make that a bunch of mewls.  
  
He was about to lean over and lift the snowy white one up when they pawed at his pants and scurried off, waiting at a distance. "Huh?"  
  
He looked over at the small bunch, as they looked at him, various colored eyes, expectedly. "Do you want me to follow?"  
  
Then the white snowy kitten meowed, and scurried off, followed by the bunch. He twirled his silver hair a bit, until he smiled. "I guess that is a yes."  
  
He followed after the cute kittens, a few stopping to make sure he was there. "Don't worry kitties, Ayame's still here!" He called, his smile still in place, even if his shoes were slightly covered in mud. And then he began a trek into the woods, as he hugged his precious hair close as to not get caught on a tree branch or drenched in the rain.  
  
After about 20 minutes of walking, Ayame started to whine even if it was to a bunch of little kittens. "How much longer??"  
  
The white cat stopped, turning its small head to the man, and seemed to smile. It meowed once and ran off again. The silver-haired man sighed and continued following, hoping that whatever they were leading him to was worth it.  
  
After another ten minutes, Ayame lost track of the kittens. "WAH! Now I'm lost! I should call 'Tori-kun or maybe Shiggy! Shiggy would be happy to! Not without the right motivation." A hentai grin made its way on Ayame's lips, as he was about to take his cell phone out, was it not for the mewling and purrs that he could faintly hear, mostly due to the rain.  
  
Stepping forward, Ayame passed another tree and looked down to see the familiar litter of cats, but among them, one caught his attention. In the center of the pile, a small ginger colored cat rested, its eyes closed, drenched from the rain. He watched as the other cats slowly rubbed against it, as if trying to provide the other warmth.  
  
"Kawaii!"  
  
Then the cat's left eye twitched slightly, as both eyes slowly opened, scarlet meeting the golden one's of the snake. That was when Ayame finally realized why the orange cat seemed familiar.  
  
"K-Kyou?!?!"  
  
The crimson eyes looked at the other in a daze, while filled with sorrow. Noticing this, the snake quickly felt pain run in his chest, as he stared at the vulnerable, broken state of his brother's lover.  
  
"Why are you so sad, Kyou-kun?"  
  
He swore he saw a tear fall from one of those beautiful crimson eyes, but it could have easily been the rain. A soft desperate mewl escaped the auburn cat, as his eyes quickly closed. Ayame, stricken with panic, quickly lifted Kyou off of the cold, dirty ground, into his arms as he tried to warm him up.  
  
"Kyou? Kyou?!?"  
  
Scarlet eyes slowly opened again, as another mewl was his only response, a smile forming on Ayame's lips. And the ginger cat felt his heart rise, trying to figure out who was holding him, his eyes half-lidded.  
  
'Kirei... Tenshi...' Kyou thought, as the white dressed man took advantage of his vulnerable state and nuzzled the cute kitten with his cheek. A small pink tongue licked gently against his cheek in response, making Ayame ecstatic. The silver hair blew gently from the wind, as it laid a soft blanket for Kyou, his orange paws hugging it.  
  
While through his mind, he thought he was in heaven with this beautiful angel, yet to realize that he was still alive.  
  
%%%  
  
To Be Continued...  
  
Aku: Well, yeah... is the pairing obvious now? Don't ask why I chose this pairing, I just see like... none. Maybe I'm blind, but I think it's cute  
  
Kyou: I'm so weak in this fic -.-;;;  
  
Momiji: REVIEW!! YEAH!!!! 


	3. Chapter Two: Allowed To Be Loved

Title: Reach For Me

Author: NT aka Aku-chan

Pairing(s): Yuki/Kyou, Ayame/Kyou

Warning(s): Yaoi AND ONLY YAOI! NO HET OR YURI! Angst, dark themes

Disclaimer: I don't own because if I did... I just might have some sanity. [Five minutes later] Okay, I lied, I wouldn't have sanity, but I still don't own it!

Aku: Okay, this took me forever to write because I'm basically... a lazy ass. I admit it and I'm sorry for those who actually waited for this!

Kyou: Thank you for the review... [grumbles about evil authoresses named Aku]

Aku: But you got Ayame now!!

Ayame: My dear sweet koneko!!!!!!!!! [glomps Kyou]

Yuki: [glares]

Aku: [sweatdrops] On with the story!

Chapter Two: Allowed To Be Loved

His eyes slowly opened up to the world, the sun shining directly in his eyes as he clenched them closed from the headache-causing rays. He curled away from the irritating light, wanting to open his eyes, only to be pulled back with a strong, yet gently force at his waist. Curious, he was about to move, until he felt the force move his body again, this time bringing him in direct contact with... something.

And that something was very warm.

Unconsciously, he curled further into the warmth, savoring the comfort as a blissful smile played over his lips, a soft purr drifting from his throat. A soft sigh released into the silence, which was recognized as a person's. Soon his mind began to play, an image of who was holding so tightly against him.

But it wasn't peaceful. It hurt.

'Yuki...' His mind called out, wanting the one beside him to be the nezumi. 'Please...' Turning his head slowly, fear and hope crawling over him, he let out a crying mewl, as he wasn't faced with Yuki.

His eyes tried to force out the tears, but nothing came, as he shut himself into his own world, not wanting to ever see reality again. Beautiful scarlet eyes dulled to mere hollow abysses of self-loathe and pure pain, everything fading to gray.

The one beside him shifted, curling closer to the other, as he yawned cutely, two sunny eyes rising to meet the beauty beside him. It would have been a peaceful, cute moment was it not for the fact Kyou edged away, almost in fear, his eyes narrowing, completely emotionless.

"Kyou?" Ayame rubbed away the sleep in his eyes, stretching a bit, before an expression of concern filled his face directed at the neko.

A soft growl emitted from Kyou's throat, as he stood up, and walked out the door. Ayame could hear the faint sound of a door closing, most likely the bathroom door. 'I wonder why Kyou is acting like this. Not that he was the friendliest person ever, but after he started dating Yuki, he did start to open up more and smile more.'

The night's events returned, Ayame pondering over it all from why Kyou was outside in the woods in the first place to why he looked so sad and hurt. 'I wonder what happened...' The only thing he could see, as a plausible answer for this was something happened between Kyou and Yuki.

'I wonder what my brother could have done to make the little kitty angel like this.' As Ayame pondered this, his feet had carried him to the kitchen, his hands gathering the ingredients for a breakfast. 'There's only thing one thing Aya-chan can do now! Cheer Kyou-chan up!!!'

The sound of water running reached Ayame's ears, as he could tell Kyou was taking a shower now. Soon, several mental images ran through his mind, none-too-innocent. Shaking his heads, he mentally kicked himself. 'This is your brother's boyfriend! He's off-limits!! Then again... it's only imagining- no! No thoughts on Kyou!!' As he finished scolding himself, he focused on cooking breakfast for the neko.

Setting the table, he felt eyes on him and looked up at the doorway to a rather wet Kyou with a towel around his waist. Blinking a few times to keep the bad thoughts away, Ayame smiled, as he witnessed the small blush on the caramel-colored cheeks.

"I need clothes..." Kyou whispered, keeping his gaze on the floor.

"You can just borrow some of mine. Yours are a bit dirty. Have to wash them." Ayame smiled and Kyou scurried off to Ayame's bedroom. Five minutes later, Kyou walked back outside, wearing rather odd clothes for him...

He wore a red top that showed off his midriff, as one side fell off his shoulder revealing the caramel skin and his pants were black and too big for him, so they slipped a bit lower than they should have, showing off slightly paler skin from lack of sun. At the sight, Ayame had to stare.

Kyou blushed, as he looked at the floor, feeling very vulnerable at the moment. "You have no decent clothes..." The redhead muttered.

Ayame was about to apologize for his lack of decent clothes, until of course, he had a rather brilliant idea – in his opinion at least – not passing up this most perfect opportunity. "I'll find some other clothes for you then. But for now, you'll have to deal with those. I made some breakfast, if you'd care to join me."

Kyou merely nodded, as he soundlessly made his way over to the table, into a chair, where a plate of eggs, bacon and toast lay before him. The silver-haired man smiled, and prepared a large glass of milk for the neko, knowing how found the boy seemed to be of the drink.

"Waaahhhhh, I'm sooo full!!" Ayame declared, as his plate was cleared, save for a few crumbs. His sun-kissed eyes looked over at the boy sitting across from him, the happiness in his eyes quickly dissolving. Kyou hadn't touched any of his food, as his fork would only push the food around. Although the snake was worried about his health that wasn't what bothered him the most. The once blazing scarlet eyes were now dimmed to a dull red that held a lost, abandoned look to them, trying to hide a deeper sorrow and darker pain.

Unable to stand such a look, the distance between the two Souma was no longer, as Kyou found himself in an embrace with the other. His ember eyes opened in shock, quickly melted into realization. But as most would expect, he did not push the other away. Contrary to it, Kyou found himself wanting Ayame's warmth, a soft whimper escaping his lips, as he tried to fall deeper into the heart-comforting arms. The older Souma was also shocked, expecting to be punched or other from the normally violent redhead, but he did not let the shock overcome his own need to hold the younger Souma. Taking in whatever the younger one allowed, Ayame tightened his hold gently, running his hand in a soothing motion over the neko's back.

Willing the pain away, Kyou found his eyes beginning to burn with a need, as he shook his head violently. Witnessing the out-of-place action, Ayame didn't want Kyou to hold any pain inside of him. "Don't be afraid to cry, my koneko. I'm here, I'll catch you when you fall."

And Ayame seemed to be the final push Kyou needed to fall, as the neko finally let the tears go, but keeping to his words, Ayame held onto the boy, catching him as he fell. His mere presence, to the neko, in itself was a comfort. A comfort that the cursed boy never thought would exist once more in his life.

But a person can only do so much for another.

"...why...?" Ayame barely picked up the soft whisper.

"Why what?" The snake blinked confused.

"Why... am I not allowed... to be loved?" Kyou asked, as his eyes once again was blurred by tears, as past memories of the nezumi returned.

Stunned by the question, Ayame was speechless. 'Not allowed to be loved?' He was confused, and pained to have to watch the once loud and brash boy slowly break.

"You are allowed to be love, Kyou." He tried to comfort him as best as he could, but with the life of the cat, words are only there to fool and bring more darkness.

"No! I'm not!!" An anger burned in his eyes, but the fire didn't return, only an empty anger. "I've never been! My real dad only wanted me dead!!! He couldn't even bare to look at me, his own son!! And Okaasan... she never really loved me. She only could fear me. I always thought that she loved me. Loved me like a mother should, but whenever I remember her eyes... they never had any love in them. Just... fear... and pity. And when I looked deeper, there was always that hatred. No matter how much I tried to be a good boy... the hatred would always be there..."

"Kyou..."

"There was always that hatred. I always tried to get used to it... but... Otousan told me 'hatred is never something to get used to'. He didn't hit me or yell at me when I cried. No, Otousan didn't do that... he held me in his arms and I forgot everything about being cursed and being a Souma. All I thought about was how much I wanted him to be my real father..."

'Kazuma.' Ayame concluded was the 'otousan' Kyou spoke of. He always admired Kazuma for going against every warning from the other Souma's and took Kyou into his own home. And when he grew older, Ayame also thanked the man.

"But... Otousan only pitied me." Kyou's lips curved into a bitter smile. "Otousan only wanted to heal his regretful heart for his grandfather who was also cursed with the cat. It was never love for me."

"No, you're wrong, Kyou-"

But it was like the boy was in a trance, in a hall of memories where he couldn't stop moving deeper in to reach the darkness at the end. It drew him in closely, as he had the curiosity of a cat. "My cousins don't need me, nor want me near them. Always a 'baka neko', wasn't I? The cat was the pitied one, the hated one, the outcast. Tohru... I was a stray in her eyes. Just a stray, helpless cat caught in the rain."

"Stop it, Kyou-" But Ayame stopped himself at the next word uttered by the neko.

"Yuki..." The ember eyes grew darker, even the anger slowly dissipated. Looking into those eyes, all was left was a torrent of pain and sorrow, mixing into a suicidal storm that was calm, but deadly. It was standing on a cliff, waiting fearfully for the moment when the darkened clouds would worsen and the waves would engulf everything in sight, as lightning would strike down burn away the peace, thunder growling in anger for the sins resting on its once beautiful ground and the cliff would crack beneath the weight of hatred upon his shoulders. That was the only thing left, waiting for the support beneath his feet to break. For the black waters to swallow him like he was nothing.

"I'm nothing to him, aren't I?" Because he was.

"He never loved me... did he?" Waiting to fall.

"He only used me... but I let him..." The cracks spread so quickly.

"I gave him everything that I could..." It was falling before his eyes.

"But..." The waves hungry for the one on the cliff.

"All I could give... all I could do..." It was like flying...

"Was love him..." With broken, sinful wings.

The water's edge was coming so closer, a dark abyss waiting to comfort him by numbing his core. But he never reached his deadly salvation. He never touched the surface of the raging waters. Instead, he felt the arms of another, the warm spreading like wild fire throughout his body, carried through his veins. The silver-hair drifted over his senses, as he took in the scent of forest. The dew drops clinging desperately to the leaves that had yet fallen, the heavenly rays of the sun that managed to pass the thick, lush limbs of aging oak, the small umbrellas that littered the moist soiled floor, the crunch of the leaves beneath your feet, and the gentle breeze that would fill your insides with such a calm that you'd expect to find an angel, or hear the grass and trees and leaves sing, or anything that went far beyond the limits of possible.

"Kyou, don't... don't ever talk like that!" The taller of the two yelled, his heart pounding painfully, as he held on to the boy tighter. "Please... don't do this to yourself..."

"Why... why wasn't it enough...? Why wasn't my love enough...?" He was smaller than he ever was. Like a child asking his mother why his father was gone. It was tearing him apart, deep within the confines of the snake, it burned like touching the coldest ice. His eyes stung at the beautiful, broken sight. Blessed and cursed to be able to witness his emotions.

"Your love is enough, Kyou. You've always been enough."

"No, I haven't!! Everyone abandons me! Everyone pushes me aside like I'm nothing!"

Ayame shook his head, still holding the vulnerable boy in his warm arms, as he gently caressed the tears, knowing at the moment, he couldn't push them away. Later, he would. But now, he only cherished the crystal drops that fell from the drained scarlet eyes.

"You're not nothing, Kyou. You're everything... to me."

Eyes filled with a soft glow, a soft shimmer of hope, though caged in by uncertainty. Ayame understood he'd have to rebuild a broken trust. But he was more than willing to mend a shattered cat's heart, even if the pieces ranged in the millions. Each shard restored would be worth the time he could love the younger Souma.

"W-why... why are you...?" The curiosity sparked once again in the depths of scarlet.

"Because, my koneko, I love you."

To Be Continued...

Aku: Cliché way to end a chapter? I know, but I like it, so deal :P If there's any mistakes, I apologized, but I didn't feel like editing.

Kyou: [too stunned to talk]

Aku: Didn't see that did ya, my koneko???

Kyou: [glares]

Aku: Err... I mean, Ayame's koneko!

Ayame: Much better!

Yuki: [glares more]

Aku: Oh poo, I have the nezumi to deal with too. [smirks evilly] And plans I do have.

Everyone: [sweatdrops]

Aku: Please review to make a little kitty happy!!

Kyou: I am NOT a little KITTY!!!!

Ayame: Yes, you are.

Kyou: [pouts]


	4. Chapter Three: Sweet Memories

Title: Reach For Me

Author: NT aka Aku-chan

Pairing(s): Yuki/Kyou, Ayame/Kyou

Warning(s): Yaoi AND ONLY YAOI! NO HET OR YURI! Angst, dark themes

Disclaimer: If I owned... hmm, not a bad idea if I owned... it would just be NC-17 (grins) not a bad idea at all... only in my imagination though!

Aku: Sorry for the delay! My laptop has been getting eaten by viruses... and they keep reinstalling into my laptop therefore my laptop crashes at random intervals... and I'm trying to clear up space on my laptop and... then decides to take down some of my stories, postponing my updates eve more! WAHHH! Anyways, while I'm on summer break and like the responsible child I am, I procrastinate on my summer work and decide to work on some fics, and since I just got a death threat on this one, I decided to work on it a bit. Although I have indulged in my new hobby of sewing and-

Kyou: SHUT UP ALREADY! NO ONE CARES!

Aku: (pouts) fiiiiiine...

Yuki: Here's chapter three.

Aku: WAIT! One more thing... I'M SORRY! Okay... I'm good.

**Chapter Three: Sweet Memories, Sweeter Present**

It was innocent enough. It seemed like almost nothing, well, he knew it was definitely not nothing, but that didn't mean he wanted to think on it more than he had to. Sure, it wasn't something that happened often nor was it ordinary or remotely close to what he imagined possible in his life. But denial wasn't the road he was about to take, so he simply accepted the unacceptable.

"Y-Yuki..." Kyou moaned out, as the nezumi's hand tangled in his hair and lips drifted dangerously close to his own. He felt a hand slip beneath his shirt, roaming indecently across his skin, causing the muscles to tighten and shiver.

It was odd, to say the least. Kyou had no idea how it came to this, but one minute Yuki is close to falling into unconsciousness, and the next thing, Kyou finds himself straddled by the nezumi and being practically molested by said cousin.

"Kyou." Yuki whispered between kisses, as he induced more friction between the two. "I... heard you... last night..."

Kyou froze beneath the nezumi, gathering the words whispered hotly against his ear. Had he heard right? Maybe he was hallucinating. I mean, what sane person can think with such a delicious body on top, doing equivalently delicious things with his tongue? Then again... maybe he wasn't imagining the words the nezumi spoke, but this entirely impossible situation he was in. Kyou sighed, cursing his overly active imagination and waited out the rest of the "fantasy" he named.

"And what... of it?" Kyou asked, between his moans, as he bit onto his finger to stop from the purr that desperately wanted to slip from his lips.

"Do you remember what you said?" Yuki asked, lighting nipping on the neko's earlobe. Receiving a swift shake of the head and a purr from the boy beneath him, Yuki smirked and continued. "You were moaning out my name so sensually, while you were touching yourself. I could remember the way your face flustered like it is now. You looked so delicious, caught up in a dream about me it seems. You whimpered, and I could tell that you wanted more, but I didn't give you more. And then you whispered something I'll never forget."

The nezumi leaned in closer, pressing his entire body against Kyou's, savoring each piece of flesh that touched. He relaxed every muscle, the only resistance of his body from gravity being Kyou's own.

"W-what... did I... s-say...?" Kyou managed to breathe out, as Yuki grinded his hips, thrusting his groin against Kyou's to prove to him this wasn't a dream.

"You said 'Touch me, Yuki'." Maybe it was the rush from the words or maybe it could have simply been the exhilaration through his veins whenever the other touched him in such sinful ways. Whatever the reason may be, Kyou let the nezumi have every part of him, giving away his pride so easily for this moment.

"Say it." A touch here and a kiss there. It had started out innocent. They were all accidental, they would say. It wouldn't go any farther, both would deny. Because no matter how accidental or how suppressed, it would still remain the same.

"Say it, Kyou." It was wrong. They were both male, cousins even. But they were so much farther apart than cousins. If you asked one of them before, the answer would be so plainly obvious. Never. They neither considered each other family because once they did, it would be even more wrong than when it had began. It had started out so innocent, too.

"Say it for me, Kyou." And it was time for them to live up to their so-called sins and take the chance. Because the next time it would arise may be never. And if you asked them now, they would answer 'Never'.

"T-touch me... Yuki..." It was never supposed to happen, but they would never return it and pretend it never did. It would never be forgiven, never to be traded, and never to be lived down. It would never be betrayed and never be lost. Well, at least that is what he had concluded. "Touch me, Yuki."

"Hai..." It would never be forgotten. That, he could trust. If anything in this world, he could trust his memory. Well, only to a point. But for now, it would be good enough for him. He would settle for anything because when you live a life where you are neither good enough nor care enough, everything to you is in black and white.

"Yu... ki... Yuki... Yuki!" He would never forget, but now he wonders.

"Yuki?" Is this okay?

"Hai?" Is he happy with this?

"Aishiteru, Yuki..." Is he content with what is left?

"...Oyasumi, Kyou." Is it okay to want... more?

"...Oyasumi." He understands.

**ooooo**

"Gomen, Kyou. I know that's not what you need right now. Just... just forget it." The hebi grinned sheepishly, as he cleared the table from the half-eaten breakfast. Kyou nodded dumbly, walking up to help with the dishes. Ayame smiled, and continued to wonder how Kyou became so subdued, yet emotionally stressed. 'It has to be due to Yuki. Something happened... I wonder what.'

"Ne, Kyonkichi, want to head out for a bit?" Kyou glanced upwards at the taller man, one perfectly arched eyebrow. Shrugging he mumbled an 'okay' before drying off the dish in his hand. Ayame sighed, knowing Kyou read his words for what they really were, which was the only reason he agreed.

'Want to take your mind off of Yuki?'

'Okay.'

"Where are we going?" Kyou absentmindedly asked, playing with a leaf that had fallen on his head while he waited patiently outside of the door for Ayame to join him. Autumn was always his favorite season, even though it was a rather depressing one, but it was for that reason he loved it. It calmed his soul and left him pensive. But then he could clearly remember the times when it was only him and Yuki. Walking through the rain of falling leaves, he was so graceful and beautiful with that smile saved for him. It seemed so real, he wanted to reach out and touch it, but Yuki was only one step ahead, just out of his reach.

"_Try and catch me, Kyou!" He would call and it shattered everything within Kyou. _

Becase he never did manage to catch him.

"Kyonkichi? Kyon-Kyon? Kyou!" Ayame waved frantically in front of Kyou's blank face, trying to snap the neko out of his reverie.

"Huh?" Kyou blinked, then stared curiously at the hebi.

"Are you okay?" Ayame glanced at the leaf the sun-kissed haired boy spun between his fingers. Cute, he thought at the innocence Kyou radiated even without trying. It was just a quality of Kyou that would always remain no matter what. Even in his blunt anger, Kyou was still innocent and naïve – a fact that the Ayame cherished.

"Hai. I'm fine." Kyou replied softly, letting the leaf touch his lips gentle, the scent of autumn filling him. "I'm fine..."

Gently clasping his hand in Kyou's, Ayame looked away from the startled face, knowing full well that it would be flustered from the action. But surprisingly, the neko did not pull away from the contact, which caused the hebi's heart to warm.

"Well, we're here!" Ayame announced happily, as they stood before the mall.

"Why are we here?" Curiosity spurred in his scarlet eyes, as he glanced around to see the slow-paced day of a lazy Autumn Sunday.

"To shop, of course! What else do you do at a mall?" Ayame's sun-kissed eyes gleamed happily, as he continued to drag the neko into the large three-floor building. If he had looked back then, he would have swore that his younger cousin wanted to cry.

It seemed to be that everything brought memories of the nezumi for him. Maybe he had fell entirely to the point of obsession.

"_What else do you do at a mall?" _

He smiled sadly, remembering the times Yuki and him spent at the mall. More than half of those times were spent with playful touches and stealing kisses from one another. Although it was definitely not the best place to have chosen for quite a few of their meetings, it was better than home.

'Yeah, better than home.' Kyou clutched tightly to Ayame's hand, the hebi sending a questioning look to the other, but he understood and continued walking. The two Souma's remained silent, as the neko never let go of the other's hand. It felt safe to him. Better.

Staring up at the hebi, he noticed for the first time how tall he was and even if his frame looked fragile, he did have an outline of muscle. He smiled slightly, glad to know that even as his brother, Ayame looked nothing like Yuki.

"_Because, my koneko, I love you."_

It was definitely unexpected. He was sure the man would be confessing a love like that to Hatori or to that stupid inu. But to him, that was the last person he would have suspected. And he considered it. Ayame... loved him... it was sinking in his mind. Ayame loved him. Ayame, even knowing about Kyou and the true side of the cat, loved him. And that love wasn't like Tohru's sympathy or Otousan's guilt. It wasn't like Okaasan's false one because Ayame had no real reason to be nice to him. Ayame didn't take in strays out of pity, and he had no guilt for him, and... he didn't give him sweet lies and even sweeter promises like...

Okaasan had. Like Yuki had.

Ayame... wasn't like Yuki. They may be brothers, but when you take away the blood, they are nothing alike.

"...Yuki..." Kyou mumbled out in his thoughts, as Ayame look startled by the single word breaking the silence between the two. He smiled sadly, wondering if Yuki was the only one Kyou thought of now and could think of. They all knew how much Yuki meant to Kyou, but... how much did Kyou mean to Yuki?

Sweeping away those thoughts that would only lead to anger, Ayame abruptly stopped in front of a store, sending Kyou crashing into him. Clinging to the older man to stop his fall, Kyou ended up digging his face into Ayame's back.

"Hehe, if you wanted someone to hug, you could've just asked." The hebi smiled at the blush spreading across the neko's tan cheeks. "C'mon! Let's go find Kyonkichi some clothes!"

Dragging the still flustered Kyou, Ayame easily found his place in the store, looking at various clothes that would suit his kitty. Kyou, on the other hand, was confused in all the colors and racks and decided to just follow after a bouncing Ayame. Watching the hebi, Kyou realized how exciting Ayame got with clothes, as he squealed every now and then about a shirt or pants. It was... cute. Kyou looked away, trying to dispel the redness that decided to sweep once more over his face.

After a half hour of shopping in that single store, Kyou had been forced to the changing rooms with piles of clothes thrown at him and a single "Ganbatte!" was thrown from an overly eager Ayame. Kyou sighed, but smiled all the same. It wasn't so bad being around the hebi. Looking down at the pile of clothes, he sweatdropped, clenching his fists tightly. Scratch the last comment before, being around the hebi was unhealthy. Resigning to his fate, Kyou slipped on the first outfit he saw.

Outfit after outfit, Ayame squealed out a 'kawaii!' or 'If I didn't know better, I'd say that outfit was made for you', while Kyou would yell back a 'stop that!' or 'I look like a whore!' That last comment left Ayame thinking suggestive thoughts and sharing said thoughts with Kyou, who blushed madly.

At the end of the shopping spree, Kyou finally agreed on some of Ayame's 'favorites' as long as he was allowed some decent clothes. Ayame paid the cashier happily, leaving behind an angry employee who had the task of putting away the massive pile of clothes that the two hadn't bought.

Leaving the mall, the two headed back home, Ayame chattering about what he would cook for dinner, as Kyou followed content behind. Upon arriving home – Kyou noted how easily he called Ayame's place home – the porch was occupied by a few guests.

"Kyou!" Tohru cried happily, as she was about to glomp the neko, but stopped when Kyou backed away, saying he didn't want to turn into a cat. "Oh, hehe, right."

"Kyon-Kyon, where have you been? Tohru has been worried about you!" The inu whined, as he wrapped his arms around his younger cousin, who cried out 'let go!'. Ayame smiled, as he dragged the bags of clothes into the house, asking if they wished to stay for dinner. The duo nodded, and they were all about to enter the home, if not for a presence appearing.

"Stupid baka neko, worrying Tohru like that." A familiar voice said from behind, causing Kyou to freeze and the rest to look.

"I thought you had plans tonight, Yuki." Shigure blinked curiously at his younger cousin, not realizing Kyou had slipped away and backed as far away as possible, which ended up being where Ayame stood.

"Iie, they were cancelled." Yuki said flatly, eyeing the neko, who held back a whimper and looked away.

"Would you like me to help with that dinner, Ayame?" Tohru asked brightly, not noticing the tension in the air.

"Iie, I'll just have Kyou help me! After all, he's living here now." Ayame smiled easily at the shocked expressions of everyone, including Kyou.

"WAAHH! You stole my kitty away, Ayame!" Shigure said with faked tears, but he smiled, nodding at the flame-haired boy. "You can gather your things tomorrow, Kyou."

"Hontou ni...?" Two scarlet eyes stared hopefully up into gold-stained ones, as a quick nod and a soft 'hai' was suited for the answer.

"At least now my house will survive." Shigure laughed lightly, unbeknownst to the narrowed eyes coming from behind him, directly solely at the now two residents of the home.

In the kitchen, Ayame and Kyou silently worked on dinner, the hebi glancing down at the other a few times. Kyou seemed okay for the most part, and maybe having to deal with Yuki now was better than delaying it. But he had to make sure.

"Kyou... are you okay?" Kyou stopped cutting the vegetables, and dropped his head slightly lower.

"I don't know..." He whispered, as Ayame nodded in understanding. "If you can't, just tell me."

Looking up at the older man who resumed mixing the soup, Kyou smiled gently, nodded even if the hebi couldn't see it.

Dinner had remained relatively peaceful, although tensions were still present, mainly between the nezumi and neko who unfortunately had to sit beside one another. Yuki's eyes glanced over at Kyou, enjoying the flinches every time his leg or arm came into contact with him. Even if he was no longer dating the neko, it didn't mean he couldn't still play with him.

Thankfully for Kyou, he excused himself to go to the bathroom. But coincidentally – or not so much – Yuki also excused himself for one reason or another and followed Kyou. The neko sighed, telling himself he could handle the situation, as he lightly splashed water over his face, before he turned to exit, only to be face to face with the one person he didn't wish to see at the moment.

"Kyou..." Yuki smirked as said boy backed away with each step the nezumi took until he was cornered. "Why did you run away to here, Kyou? Couldn't handle seeing me anymore?"

Yuki pushed his body closer to Kyou, as the neko struggled to free himself. Grasping his wrists and pinning them behind him, the nezumi easily overpowered the other. "Did you love me that much?"

Kyou winced at the words, wanting to call for help, but knowing that somehow, he would be blamed or no one would bother. He tried to kick his legs out, but Yuki's own legs had his trapped, his entire pressed against his own.

"Or... is it that you still love me?" Yuki whispered out the words, his breath hot against Kyou's flesh. "Do you want this, Kyou?"

It was like the first time. Yuki forced Kyou to indulge in all the sinful pleasure, leaving him breathless and ashamed at his want and need. His body reacted completely contrary to his thoughts, and it felt like he was falling all over again. He was even when he knew the outcome of it all. But he had promised himself. He had promised to... give Ayame a chance. Because Ayame... loved him. Not like how everyone else 'loved' him.

"No... I don't want this." Kyou whispered back, his eyes in a shadow of his eyes.

"Your body seems to think differently."

"No... no... I don't want this!" Kyou cried out, as his clothes were coming off and tears pricked his eyes. He didn't want this, not again. He couldn't handle being broken again. 'Ayame...'

He was going to give Ayame a chance. But if Yuki... if Yuki did things to him again, he would be dirty again. Ayame... Ayame wouldn't want him.

'Ayame...'

"Say it, Kyou..."

'Ayame...'

"Say it for me, Kyou..."

'Aya...me...'

Was he too far gone that he would allow this? He wondered if this was how it was going to be, until Yuki would finally find him boring and leave him again.

"Say it now, Kyou."

"...Touch me..." He was too far gone. "Touch me..."

"Say my name." The moans were more distant to him, his own lips moving in his reflection, but he couldn't hear any of the sounds. But he heard his voice perfectly. "Say my name..."

"Yu... ki..." He was much too far gone. "Yuki.,. Yuki!" He was going to let this happen.

"That's a good boy..." He knew in the end, he was to be broken again. "You're mine, Kyou. Remember that."

He couldn't give him the chance now.

'Gomen... gomen, Ayame...'

**_To Be Continued..._**

Aku: Uhhhh... I don't really know where I'm going with this... but... rawr!

Kyou: You sadist...

Aku: ...and your point?

Kyou: -.-;;;

Aku: Sorry to any Yuki fans that he went kind of... bastard... I didn't really plan that but I never know what I'm writing until after I've written. Please review!


End file.
